WHISK Espresso Bar + Bake Shop

A small group of us were heading to a friend's place for yet another round of mutton and curry for teatime, so we decided to meet up earlier for lunch at Subang Jaya's Empire Shopping Gallery. Now, the first complaint--which is completely unrelated to the topic--the toilets on the ground floor stink immensely. An unholy combination of urine and garbage creates a truly malodorous environment. Yucks. After having lunch at Pasta Zanmai (the review will come later) we thought to ourselves, what's a better way to wash down high-starch content food? why, with desserts, of course!

Narrow as narrow is.

Tucked away (yes, I am using tucked away again) in a small shoplot near the Jaya Grocer is the quaint but dusky WHISK Espresso Bar + Bake Shop. I'm not sure why the whisk is in capitals but let's assume they use it for whisking activities. Upon walking in, you'll realise how small the premises are and with my wide shoulders I nearly took down the cash register. I kid you not.

No Twilight fan's blood was used during the making of this cupcake.

 My sister and our friend, Paramore, ordered the red velvet cupcake and a slice of cake called, in Wolverine's voice, Bub's. Red velvet cakes get the colour not from having a Twilight fan's blood but by red colouring (DUH). It was bland and dry, kind of like the sponge cake you can get from Baker's Cottage.

Hey bub, I'm Bub. 

The Bub's cake was interesting, it's a 3-tier cake with bananas, layered with peanut butter and topped with cream cheese frosting. For all you bodybuilders, peanut butter is your friend, cream no. This is surely their best cake.  

Marble cake. Sweet but dry.

Cafe latte. I did not get to try this. Pretty pattern, though.

Super Shopper ordered the marble cake and a cafe latte. The cake was colourful and cheery-looking. Too bad it didn't taste as good as it looked. It was too sweet for me and just like the red velvet cupcake, the texture was dry. As for the cafe latte, I didn't taste it but I did admire its pretty design.

WHISK also has macaroons, which they call macarons (related to macaroni?), in a myriad of colours and flavours. It costs RM2 for one that's about the size of a cookie. They better be good. Apart from desserts, they also have pizzas and pastas (if I remember correctly). Pizza looked like it came from a microwave pack, though.

Cartoon caricature adorn the mirrored walls. Cute.

Beatle-esque designs? I reckon so.

Prices are decent, ranged between RM2 to RM15 for most items. Despite its limited seating and narrowness, I wouldn't rule out from patronising there again on a lazy Sunday afternoon with friends. I found it to be a great spot to gossip.

Yes, I said it, even bodybuilders gossip.

Pros:

• I'll say it again, it's a little quaint hole in the wall that's a great spot for people to hang out.
• Good music selection. They played The Beatles which is a damn good thing in my book.

Cons:

• Food was presented nicely but the taste was so-so. 
• Prices are a wee bitty high.

Stay tuned, stay hungry.

WHISK Espresso Bar + Bake Shop
LG 03A Empire Shopping Gallery
(Very near to the Jaya Grocer)

The Bee

Bee's iced water. In a pint. Yay.

Tucked away at a little corner of Jaya One is a rather quaint place called The Bee. This is odd since there are no bees involved as far as I can tell; no caricatures of bees, nobody dressed like a bee, nothing bee-like here, to be honest.

Girls with guitars and silly-sounding voices would fit right in here.

The Bee serves Western food that we all know. Nothing new, right? However, the offerings were somewhat unique, some new and never heard before, others a different take on classics. The prerequisites are available: pastas, burgers, caffeinated beverages, desserts, etc. Imagine a slightly upscale Coffee Bean and you'll get the idea.

Large wooden tables and benches to prop your large butt on.

After perusing the menu for a bit, I settled on their Mexican burger. Prices are typical of eateries these days, shy under RM20 for their priciest burger with the rest of the food ranging from RM10 to RM20 with drinks and desserts generally around the RM10 range. 

Clever usage of every day household items. My mom would say it's a way of pegs, though.

The decor is rather fetching, with a hint of French-influenced chic, kind of what a typical Western cafe looks like. The furniture inside is mostly wooden, nothing fancy but there is an area presumably used for girls with an acoustic guitar and chipmunk voices to perform their "original" (read: zzzZZZ...) material. Overall, it is cosy, welcoming and wonderfully unpretentious coughTheApartmentcough unlike other cafes I've been to. Music selection was of the singer-songwriter-guitar player variety which suited the cafe's ambiance adroitly.

My Mexican burger. I subbed the fries with salad.

I could see from afar my burger's arrival. It looked small. But when I finally looked at it properly, I could see that the meat patty was about an inch thick. Promising stuff. You know when people say Mexican-influence it means throwing in Tabasco sauce? Well, my burger came with beans and mild jalapenos. Nothing new but much appreciated. They make their own patties and it really shows. It was juicy, succulent and had a real bite to it. First ever Bee's burger, certainly not my last.

Churros with ganache.

RM was full from all the Deepavali food so she opted for the banana-and-something pancake. Sadly, we were about 4 hours too late as it's only served during brunch hours. So we chose churros, the Spanish equivalent to the Chinese you tiao. The last time I had churros was in Singapore, they were like flaccid dicks. Bee's were erect, crispy and the inside just tangible enough to not make it like a limp banana. The accompanying ganache was just about right in its sweetness.

Malt-and-peanut butter ice cream. Rock hard texture.

I'm not a big ice cream person but I do like to try me some new flavours so when I saw malt-and-peanut butter I had to give it a go. The best part was its flavour, the peanut butter took center stage with the malt peeking behind. The not so good part was the state it arrived, the ice in ice cream prevalent. Lifting 20kg dumbbbells was easier compared to getting a tiny scoop. Though, it's not made by Bee's, rather, it's from The Last Polka. Maybe they should come up with a more pliable, creamier texture that doesn't end up becoming miniature glaciers. I hope the name doesn't come to haunt them. I don't like polka. 

Service was good. None of the servers were pushy or rude. They looked like very decent people; people with whom you can have a nice cuppa and intelligent conversations. The thing I like a lot about it was that it didn't pretend to be something it's not, as opposed to the nearby Brussels Beer Cafe with its sleazy-looking clientele.

The staff were friendly and looked like nice people to hang with.

I'm glad my first review is that of a good eatery. If you're into burgers you can't do wrong here. Even the pasta dishes looked equally as delectable from what we could see. Make a BEEline to Bee's and you'll not leave unhappy. Oh, yeah, I totally punned that.  

Pros:

• Clean premises.
• Great food and service.
• Just right prices and portions.
• Iced water came in a pint! Awesome. 

Cons:

• The malt-and-peanut butter ice cream was like an ice block. Nice flavours, torture on the arm. 

Stay tuned, stay hungry. 

The Bee 
2A-G, Block K, Jaya One
No.72 Jalan Universiti, Section 13
46200 Petaling Jaya
Selangor Darul Ehsan 

The Muscle Foodie - An Introduction

I like to eat good food. Who doesn't, right?

The thing is, what tastes good for you wouldn't necessarily taste good to me, right? Most likely because your taste in food, well, sucks.

Right?

Like the header says, I am a pretentious, bodybuilder-wannabe dude who likes good and honest food. And like the good and honest food I eat, I will give my darndest best and truthful opinion on it. Unlike other food bloggers who tend to write about how pretty a piece of chicken is or how they have successfully used a fancy photography trick, I will give you more information about the establishment, the service and most especially the food, which I find really lacking. It may not be conclusive but I certainly wouldn't use many exclamations marks just to say how pretty a piece of chicken is.

What I'm trying to say is other food bloggers write shitty reviews, choosing instead to showcase their prowess with a camera. So, people, if you want to know what a real snobby, mofo dude who think he's some big time charlie, you've come to the right place.

Stay tuned, stay hungry.